Culinography article

Culinography/bibliography.bib

@@ -0,0 +1,33 @@
+@article{Sto,
+  title   = {Answering the question nobody asked: What is the most important rock?},
+  journal = {Journal of immaterial science},
+  author  = {Stones, Ligma},
+  year    = {in preperation}
+} 
+
+@article{SkinnyP,
+  title   = {A Scalable Synthesis of Methamphetamine},
+  journal = {Journal of immaterial science},
+  volume  = {2},
+  year    = {2022},
+  author  = {Revolución , DD and Kwaft , Fweedel and Woodward , R&B}
+}
+
+@book{Rumsey2011,
+  author    = {Rumsey, Deborah J.},
+  year      = {2011},
+  title     = {Statistics For Dummies - },
+  edition   = {},
+  isbn      = {978-0-470-91108-2},
+  publisher = {Wiley},
+  address   = {New York}
+}
+
+@book{bibel,
+  author = {Samuel},
+  place     = {Jerusalem, Israel},
+  publisher = {Jesus Christ},
+  url       = {https://diebibel.ibep-prod.com/bibel/LU84/1SA.17},
+  title     = {The Bible},
+  chapter   = {1. Samuel 17}
+} 

Culinography/diagrams/Frank.tex

@@ -0,0 +1,27 @@
+\begin{tikzpicture}[scale = 0.4]
+    \node {$\bullet$};
+
+    \newdimen\R
+    \foreach \R in {1,2,...,5}
+    \draw (0:\R) \foreach \x in {60,120,...,360} {
+            -- (\x:\R)
+            (0,0) -- (\x:\R)
+        };
+
+    \foreach \x/\l/\p in
+    { 60/{acidity}/above,
+    120/{metallicness}/above,
+    180/{cancerous}/left,
+    240/{lethality}/below,
+    300/{solubility}/below,
+    360/{toughness}/right
+    }
+    \node[inner sep=1pt,circle,draw,fill,label={\p:\l}] at (\x:5) {};
+
+    \fill[color = blue!25]
+    \foreach \x/\R in {60/0,120/2.5,180/1,240/5,300/0,360/5} {
+            -- (\x:\R)
+        };
+
+    \node[inner sep = 1.7pt, circle,draw,fill, color=blue!25] at (0:5){};
+\end{tikzpicture}

Culinography/diagrams/poprocks.tex

@@ -0,0 +1,25 @@
+\begin{tikzpicture}[scale = 0.4]
+    \node {$\bullet$};
+
+    \newdimen\R
+    \foreach \R in {1,2,...,5}
+    \draw (0:\R) \foreach \x in {60,120,...,360} {
+            -- (\x:\R)
+            (0,0) -- (\x:\R)
+        };
+
+    \foreach \x/\l/\p in
+    { 60/{acidity}/above,
+    120/{metallicness}/above,
+    180/{cancerous}/left,
+    240/{lethality}/below,
+    300/{solubility}/below,
+    360/{toughness}/right
+    }
+    \node[inner sep=1pt,circle,draw,fill,label={\p:\l}] at (\x:5) {};
+
+    \fill[color = blue!25]
+    \foreach \x/\R in {60/1,120/0,180/5.5,240/2,300/3.5,360/1} {
+            -- (\x:\R)
+        };
+\end{tikzpicture}

Culinography/diagrams/raw.tex

@@ -0,0 +1,21 @@
+\begin{tikzpicture}[scale = 0.4]
+    \node {$\bullet$};
+
+    \newdimen\R
+    \foreach \R in {1,2,...,5}
+    \draw (0:\R) \foreach \x in {60,120,...,360} {
+            -- (\x:\R)
+            (0,0) -- (\x:\R)
+        };
+
+    \foreach \x/\l/\p in
+    { 60/{acidity}/above,
+    120/{metallicness}/above,
+    180/{cancerous}/left,
+    240/{lethality}/below,
+    300/{solubility}/below,
+    360/{toughness}/right
+    }
+    \node[inner sep=1pt,circle,draw,fill,label={\p:\l}] at (\x:5) {};
+
+\end{tikzpicture}

Culinography/diagrams/rock.tex

@@ -0,0 +1,27 @@
+\begin{tikzpicture}[scale = 0.4]
+    \node {$\bullet$};
+
+    \newdimen\R
+    \foreach \R in {1,2,...,5}
+    \draw (0:\R) \foreach \x in {60,120,...,360} {
+            -- (\x:\R)
+            (0,0) -- (\x:\R)
+        };
+
+    \foreach \x/\l/\p in
+    { 60/{acidity}/above,
+    120/{metallicness}/above,
+    180/{cancerous}/left,
+    300/{solubility}/below,
+    360/{toughness}/right
+    }
+    \node[inner sep=1pt,circle,draw,fill,label={\p:\l}] at (\x:5) {};
+
+    \fill[color = blue!25]
+    \foreach \x/\R in {60/0,120/0,180/5.5,240/7,300/4,360/3} {
+            -- (\x:\R)
+        };
+
+    \node[inner sep=1pt,label={below:lethality}] at (240:5) {};
+
+\end{tikzpicture}

Culinography/main.tex

@@ -19,7 +19,7 @@
 \pagestyle{fancy}
 \lhead{}
 \rhead{CelloClemens et al.}
-\cfoot{\thepage }
+\cfoot{\thepage}
  
 %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
 

Culinography/mydefs.tex

@@ -1,7 +1,7 @@
 \usepackage{lipsum}
 \usepackage[T1]{fontenc}
 \usepackage[sfdefault]{biolinum}
-\biolinum
+\biolinum{}
 \usepackage{listings}
 \usepackage{mathrsfs}
 \usepackage{algorithm}
@@ -9,6 +9,5 @@
 \usepackage{algpseudocode}
 \usepackage{emoji}
 \usepackage{soul}
-
-
-\newcommand{\acronym}{HADES }
+\usepackage{siunitx}
+\usepackage{tikz}

Culinography/project.tex

@@ -1,5 +1,5 @@
 \twocolumn[
-  \title{\bf Culinography - A novel method for mineral analysis}
+  \title{\bf The Illick-Rockhard-Stones (IRS) Method For Culinographic Analysis Of Minerals}
   \author{
     Ligma Stones$^{1,2}$\\
     Ilick Rocks-Asajob$^{1,2}$\\
@@ -10,7 +10,7 @@
   \maketitle
   $^{1}$ Department for lab safety, Karlsruhe institute of suffering and sorrow (KISS), Karlsruhe, Germany \\
   $^{2}$ Chair of rock science, Karlsruhe institute of suffering and sorrow (KISS), Karlsruhe, Germany \\
-  $^{3}$ Random undergrad we bribed
+  $^{3}$ Random undergrad we blackmailed
   \begin{psummary}
     It is well known fact in the scientific commuinity that geologists frequently
     lick rocks to determine their mineral composition. With this paper we aim
@@ -27,5 +27,168 @@
 
 % The introduction
 \section{Introduction}
+For millennia scientists have been using culinographic methods to determine the composition
+of various minerals. However there is no well defined scale to quantify and
+categorize the complex tastes involved.
+
+\begin{figure}[h]
+  \centering
+  \includegraphics[width=\linewidth]{img/ancient_egyptians.png}
+  \hfill
+  \caption{An ancient Egyptian geologists sampling a rock with
+    complementary HCL}
+  \hfill
+\end{figure}
+
+This research not only presents a novel metric for culinographically
+categorizing and analyzing various minerals but also applies this scale
+to some of the most elementary of all rocks.
+
+\section{Choice of sample material}
+To establish the metric, it hat do first be crystallized out which tastes
+the metric should take into account. It is thus required to culinographically
+analyze some of the more important mineral samples. After careful selection~\cite{Sto}
+the following samples have been selected to enable developing
+an objective culinographic scale and grading these most elementary minerals on this novel scale.
+\begin{enumerate}
+  \item \textbf{Pop rocks}\\
+        although difficult to obtain in Europe where this research is based,
+        Pop rocks seem to be the standard for any type of geological analysis in the US.
+        They will thus be used as a baseline comparison in this research.
+
+  \item \textbf{``Rock''}\\
+        Sold to us by ``Skinny Pete''\cite{SkinnyP}, he told us this was ``like the best
+        rock in town dude, trust me bro''. Since this rock seems to bear importance in
+        modern society it has been included in this analysis.
+        \begin{center}
+          \begin{figure}[h]
+            \centering
+            \hfill
+            \includegraphics[width=0.45\linewidth]{img/Crack.png}
+            \hfill
+            \vspace{3mm}
+            \caption{The sample provided by Mr.\ Pete}
+            \hfill
+          \end{figure}
+        \end{center}
+
+  \item \textbf{Dwayne ``The Rock'' Johnson}\\
+        Although of high cultural significance, ``The Rock'' is quite difficult to obtain.
+        After repeated attempts to get a hold of this extremely rare substance the research team
+        tasked with this has been told to ``bugger of you bunch of drunken morons or I'll call
+        the police''. No further attempts have been made.
+
+  \item \textbf{Frank}\\
+        Frank is a random rock sourced from the university parking lot. Frank has been included
+        in this analysis because randomness is probably good for statistics~\cite{Rumsey2011}.
+\end{enumerate}
+
+After clarifying the exact basis for the following procedure, each of the samples will be classified, enabling
+the development of the most important characteristics in mineral analysis.
+
+\section{Sample characterization}
+According to standard in culinographic analysis, each of the samples was tested in multiple
+ways:\\
+The classic way --- Dissolve the sample in HCL and taste the resulting solution.\\
+The ``cool'' way --- Heat the mineral until a significant reaction occurs, inhale the resulting fumes\\
+The easy way --- Chew the sample and analyse the taste.\\
+In the following section a description of each sample utilizing each of the aforementioned
+analysis methods will be given.
+
+\subsection{Pop rocks}
+\textbf{Classic Method}\\
+After dissolving 1g of Pop rocks in 20ml of 1$\frac{\text{mMol}}{l}$ HCL, Mr.\ Rockhard
+has been blackmailed to taste and analyse the solution. The taste has been described as
+``horrific'', ``super sour'', ``metallic'', ``kinda like super cheap Sprite I guess''.
+This does not come as a surprise since the samples composition is quite similar to
+that of Sprite, whose only difference is its higher sugar content.\\
+It has been concluded that a metric for acidity and a metric for metallicness is required.\\
+\textbf{``cool'' Method}\\
+Heating the sample to about $200^\circ C$ yielded not only a brown mass but also a thick
+black fume. The fume has been described as ``Dude, this gives me cancer like for sure'' and
+``*gag* *cough* *cough*''.\\
+It can be concluded that a metric for ``cancerous'' should be factored in.\\
+\textbf{Easy Method}\\
+Pop Rocks taste sweet. Like what were you expecting, they are basically lumps of sugar you
+moron.
+
+\subsection{Rock}
+\textbf{Classic Method}\\
+After combining 0.5g of ``rock'' with 1ml of 1 molar HCL, the solution was diluted with
+10ml of $\text{H}_2\text{O}$. Unfortunately the whole sample dissolved and reacted to form
+the corresponding hydrochloride salt, which was confiscated by the lab supervisor for ``research purposes''.\\
+\textbf{``cool'' Method}\\
+The remaining 10g of the sample have been equally distributed into two professional laboratory
+grade crack pipes and tested according to the method mentioned above. One of the participants
+can not remember what exactly happened and described the experience as a ``normal Friday
+night with the boys''. The other participant is still in hospital.\\
+It can be concluded that a metric for lethality is required to culinographically categorize rocks.\\
+\textbf{Easy Method}\\
+Whilst analyzing the sample using the last method, all of it has been used up making
+further analysis impossible.
+
+\subsection{Dwayne ``The rock'' Johnson}
+Due to the inability to obtain this sample no further tests could be performed.
+
+\subsection{Frank}
+\textbf{Classic Method}\\
+The sample was insoluble in concentrated HCL.\\
+\textbf{``cool'' Method}\\
+Even after extensive heating the sample did not gas off or melt. It is suspected that the
+faulty lab burner might have been the issue here.\\
+\textbf{Easy Method}\\
+Even though still in hospital, Mr.\ Rockhard was able to test the sample. It has been described
+as being ``ouch'' and ``rock hard dude''. At this point it is not known whether the sample
+did indeed possess a high toughness or if it was merely an attribute to Mr.\ Rockhards
+weakness.\\
+It can be concluded that a metric for solubility and toughness may be required.
+
+\section{Qualitative analysis}
+After analyzing a broad collection of sample data, it has been concluded that the
+categories outlined in figure \ref{raw_diagram} are required in order to fully characterize any mineral. The values have been normalized enabling easy comparison.
+
+\begin{figure}[h]
+  \input{diagrams/raw}
+  \caption{A nice diagram we made!}\label{raw_diagram}
+\end{figure}
+The following diagrams give the values determined for each of the samples. Since the samples
+are representative of all rocks this will allow categorizing and analyzing a wide variety
+of minerals, finally opening up the scientific field of culinography to the geological
+community.
+
+\begin{figure}[h]
+  \input{diagrams/poprocks.tex}
+  \caption{The IRS method applied to Pop Rocks}
+\end{figure}
+
+\begin{figure}[h]
+  \input{diagrams/rock.tex}
+  \vspace{3mm}
+  \caption{The IRS method applied to ``Rock''}
+\end{figure}
+
+\begin{figure}[h]
+  \input{diagrams/Frank.tex}
+  \caption{The IRS method applied to Frank from the parking lot. The sample 
+  has been found to be quite lethal~\cite{bibel}.}
+\end{figure}
+
+\section{Conclusion}
+The research presented in this paper marks a new chapter in the history
+of geology by enabling access to a novel and highly effective scientific 
+method for classification and analysis of various minerals. It will forever
+change how geological research is conducted as ``rock licking'' will no 
+longer be a subject of mockery but a valid analytical tool.\\
+The invaluable data provided here can be used not only to establish a 
+baseline for the IRS scale but to enable further research into the subject
+and deepen the knowledge and taste buds of humankind.
+
+\section{Acknowlegements and funding}
+We would kindly like to thank Mr.\ Pete for financing the most important
+part of this project by giving away a free product sample. We would also
+like to thank the undergrad who introduced us to Skinny Pete.\\
+Finally we acknowledge the hard work of Mr.\ Rockhard. He sacrificed himself
+for the cause of science. We would also like to point out that in no way are
+we reliably or in any way responsible for Mr.\ Rockhards overdose.
 
 \printbibliography[]